


Loss and Impulse

by GucciGodTae



Category: South Park
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Boys Kissing, But He makes Up For It, Cartman isnt a dick here, Craig Tucker Being An Asshole, Cuddling & Snuggling, Depression, Drinking, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Getting Together, Hospitals, M/M, Multi, OT3, Polygamy, Rough Kissing, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Suicide Attempt, Tweek and Kyle are Best Friends, Tweek angst, Tweek moves in with Kyle, hes my son, i hate typing this, i ruined him here, this isnt a joke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-03-30 23:12:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13962123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GucciGodTae/pseuds/GucciGodTae
Summary: Tweek lost everything as soon as he entered high school. His friend left him as soon as they got the opportunity. Craig dumped him. What was the point in living? Why was Tweek the one who always suffered?He should just end it.But life always has a silver lining and works out in weird ways. So, does life protect Tweek?please dont read if you're easily triggered





	Loss and Impulse

Entering high school had been the worst thing Tweek had been through. He lost everyone almost automatically. It seemed to be they didn’t want a freak or a spazz around. Craig cut things off and left him. Clyde and Token followed. Tweek never had anyone else. He didn’t consider Kyle and his group ’friends’, more like acquaintances. And hardly that.

\----

Tweek hated high school. Bullies and shitty teachers. A wave of homework every day that stressed him out. Tweek hardly slept. Between homework and working, he didn’t have any time to calm down or do something he loved. Tweek didn’t even know what he loved anymore. Tweek figured that life was hopeless. Living was a burden, and him breathing wasted precious oxygen for everyone else. Tweek felt no will to live. He didn’t see that point. What was the point in living when he had no one? No one loved him or talked to him. The people he thought loved him, threw him away the second an opportunity presented itself. Tweek sighed as he looked down at his homework. There was no point in living, so why was he still here.

Tweek shot out of his seat. He ran to the bathroom and grabbed an assortment of different pill bottles and a razor. He grabbed a small bag and threw all of it in there. Today would be the day. He was done living like this. Tweek ran past the park and to Starkes pond. When he had friends, they often went to a place a little further from Starks. There was a river of some sort. There were railings due to the sheer drop. The river moved fast and it was freezing. Someone had said a drop like that into such dangerous water could kill you. At the time, all four of the boys listening were scared. They made a promise to protect each other when they came here. Well, no one was here now.

Tweek sat on the railing and pulled the razor from his bag. Start with what you know. Tweek brought the blade to his skin and slid it across. It wasn’t too deep, enough to open the skin though. Blood came through the wound and Tweek sighed. This was his favorite thing to do. Nothing could calm him but the feeling of the blade. It was a constant. He could control it. It never left him. It couldn’t leave him like everyone else could. Tweek let out a choked sob and kept slicing his arms. The movement getting frantic and the perfectly straight lines gone. Blood was everywhere on his arm. Tweek let out a laugh that sounded almost maniacal. This was calmness. This was everything he needed. Tweek sighed and watched the blood drip off his arm. “P-pretty” he mumbled. Tweek switched hands and worked on the next arm. He wasn’t left handed, so those cuts weren’t neat at all, but he wasn’t trying or caring anymore. Tweek deemed the cutting enough and grabbed a pill bottle out of his bag. He didn’t know what to grab, so he grabbed all of them. Headache pills, to pills for his anxiety and depression.

Tweek popped open the first bottle. He looked at the amount of pills in there. It might not kill him, but mixed with the other stuff, it sure would. He hoped it would. Tweek grabbed his coffee thermos. It’s go time.

He grabbed a handful of pills and popped them in his mouth. When one entered, he swallowed it. Tweek kept doing that like a system. He sighed when the bottle was gone. The world felt sort of fuzzy. Tweek swayed back and forth on the railing. He shakily put the now empty bottle back in his bag and grabbed another one. He had four bottles in there. Tweek grabbed another one and opened it, a little difficult but he got it open. Like he did for the others, Tweek put one in his mouth and swallowed. He used the water sparingly. He had to more bottles to go through. Tweek sighed and looked at the ravine below him. This is what he wanted. So why did he feel so uneasy? He blamed it on cold feet. He didn’t have anything to live for. Tweek repeated the thoughts out loud. Trying to engrain it in him. “N-no one, ngh, l-loves me” he sighed. He was calming down. Becoming at peace with the thoughts swirling in his head.

Tweek grabbed another bottle when he heard voices. “Fuck you fatass!” Kyle yelled. Tweek froze. They couldn’t see him like this. Tweek hastily got down from the ledge. The world spun “j-jesus Christ.” He whispered. He shouldn’t have taken all those pills and then moved. Tweek groaned and tried walking. The world spun and tilted. He grabbed the railing and used it as a crutch. He used sheer determination and fear to get him moving. They couldn’t see him like this. Tweek didn’t want to burden anyone anymore. He walked as far as he could. The world slowly getting more fuzzy and darker. “Fuck” he mumbled. Tweek grabbed the third bottle. This wasn’t going according to plan. Tweek didn’t care anymore. He swallowed as much as he could. Then the world went dark.

 

 

Kyle fumed. Even as they entered high school, Cartman still made anti sematic comments at him. Kyle and Cartman argued back and forth. They were interrupted by Kenny. “Guys, what the fuck is that?” All four boys turned to where Kenny’s finger was pointing. On the railing they saw blood. “Jesus.” Stan mumbled. They looked around and saw a small trail. Kyle grabbed onto Stan “what if someone got attacked by an animal?” Stan held Kyles hand “I’ll protect you.” Cartman sighed “fucking gay. Let’s go check it out.” The four boys nodded hesitantly. They followed the trail. Cartman led along with Kenny. “What the fuck?” Kenny whispered, his voice shaky. Cartman was staring, wide eyed and silent. Kyle peeked over Kenny shoulder and felt the urge to vomit.

Tweek laid there. His arms were slashed and bloody. He was holding a mostly empty pill bottle. Even Cartman was speechless. Kyle felt a few tears fall and he ran over to Tweek. No one stopped him. Kyle shook Tweek “T-Tweek? Please wake u-up.” He sobbed. “Ambulance.” Stan mumbled. The boys stared at him “call the fucking ambulance” Stan snapped. Kyle pulled out his phone and called 9-11. He sobbed on the phone call and tried to explain everything. Stan came over and grabbed the phone, surprisingly calm and collected. Kyle sat there beside Tweek and mumbled comforting words to him. How did they let this happen? How come no one saw Tweek slowly slipping away? Kyle blamed himself, but also blamed everyone. If they had talked to Tweek more. If they all just tried a little harder, maybe this could’ve been avoided.

Kyle let out another sob. Cartman sat down on the other side of Tweek. He took of his hoodie and ripped strips of it. Everyone starred slack jawed at Cartman wrapping Tweeks arms. He wrapped them tightly and tied the ends together “it’ll stop the blood flow.” Cartman explained. “Thank you.” Kyle mumbled. Cartman shrugged “he doesn’t deserve this fate.” Kenny nodded and sat beside Cartman “if anyone deserves a happy ending, it’s him.” Stan sat beside Kyle “the ambulance will be here soon.” Kyle played with Tweeks hair and whispered comforting words. Even though he knew Tweek couldn’t hear him.

The ambulance came and whisked Tweek away from the four boys. No one knew what to say. “Where’s Craig?” Kenny asked. The other three shared a confused look. “Yeah. Where is he?” Stan asked. “I haven’t seen Tweek hang out with them in a while. The twitch was always alone.” Cartman said. The other boys thought about it and quickly realized how alone Tweek was. Kyle felt like crying again. “We should talk to Craig.” Kenny said. The boys nodded. They grabbed Tweeks bag and walked away from the river.

 

They made it to Craig’s house and knocked on the door. “What do you assholes want?” He asked. Kyle sighed “how long has it been since you’ve talked to Tweek?” Craig shrugged “no idea. Stopped talking to him when we entered high school.” Kyle made a noise of anger “what do you know about Tweek? How has he been?” Craig narrowed his eyes “is this an interrogation? Last time I talked to him, he was fine. He said he understood the reason for our ending and that he was happy he got to be my friend. Now can you fucking leave?” Kenny shook his head “dude. Tweek tried to kill himself.” Craig froze “what?” Cartman nodded “we found the spaz with his arms sliced and pill bottles. He was by the ravine. Probably was gonna jump off it.”

“But we were loud so he probably got scared and tried to run.” Stan added. Craig grabbed his jacket “we have to go to the hospital.” Kyle snorted “you aren’t allowed to see him.”

“And why the fuck not?”

“You were the cause of this.”

“How?”

“You left him. He relied on you to always be there for him. And you threw him away the first chance you got. You don’t fucking deserve to see him. We’ll keep you updated.”

“Like hell you will. That’s my ex and I deserve to see him.”

“You can **_ex_** it from his life forever. You don’t deserve him.”

“Listen you fucking dick, I’m going to see him.”

“Well go after us.”

“Fucking fine.”

Kyle nodded triumphantly and walked away. Kenny lagged behind “listen, I know you want to see Tweek, but I would wait.” Craig scoffed “fuck off dude. I’m going to see him. Jesus Christ, he tried to kill himself.” Kenny nodded “he did. No one was there for him. Bye dude.” Craig waved and Kenny ran to catch up with the group. Tweek did not deserve this.

Kenny always had a soft spot for Tweek. He was soft and pure. Tweek was loving and caring and he was good with animals. Kenny often spent a lot of time with Tweek whenever he wasn’t around Craig and those guys. Tweek didn’t deserve this fate. Cartman was right. Such a weird statement, but it was true. Tweek didn’t deserve this. They made it up to Tweeks room and stopped. “What if he never wakes up?” Kyle asked. Stan immediately pulled him into a hug “he will.” Kenny slipped past them and into the room. He made his way over to the bed. “Jesus, Tweek.” Kenny sat down in the chair and grabbed Tweeks hand. Kenny thought he was above crying, but he found himself sobbing. Tweek wasn’t like him. If Tweek died, he died for good. There was no coming back. Kenny gripped Tweeks hand. “Wake the fuck up.” He sobbed.

The other three slowly made their way into the room. Kyle sobbed and held Tweeks other hand. Stan and Cartman were stone faced, but obviously hurting. The doctor walked in “do you have any idea when his family will be here?” He asked. Kenny shrugged “knowing them, they don’t care. They probably won’t ever be here to see him.” The doctor sighed “he’s stable. He will wake up, just give him time.” The boys sighed from relief. “H-how much time?” Kyle asked. The doctor shrugged “depends on if he’s fighting or not. Try talking to him. They say that the person can hear you.” Kenny looked at Tweeks sleeping face. The doctor ran some tests, then left. Each one of the boys started speaking at once. Comforting words and words of encouragement. They would try everything to wake Tweek up.

\-----------------

Days turned into Weeks. The school had heard about Tweeks attempt and sent him their thoughts and prayers. But thoughts and prayers don’t help at all. Tweek was still in a coma. Tweek was still unresponsive. Tweek still had bandages on his arms. Tweek was still gone.

The four still went to see Tweek in the hospital. Often seeing Craig leave just as they entered. Kyle was pretty pissed at Craig, but kept it civil. 

Kyle went alone one day and saw Craig. He was crying. Kyle sighed and walked in. “Fuck. Sorry. I’ll leave.” Craig said. Kyle shook his head “no, it’s fine.” Craig nodded and they sat in silence. “I’m sorry for not being there.” Craig finally spoke up. Kyle shrugged “none of us could’ve known. We are all at fault.”

“Still. If I had tried harder. If I hadn’t fucking left him with no one.”

“You made a mistake. We all do. Yours was fucking horrible. But you’re making up for it.”

“Thanks.”

Once again silence fell over them. It was interrupted by the machine beeping faster and louder. Tweeks eyes shot open. Kyle screeched and jumped up. “Tweek? Are you with us?” Tweek stared at him “uh.” Kyle grabbed his water bottle “drink it.” He placed it on Tweeks lips and helped him drink the water. Craig stood up and played with Tweeks hair “welcome back.” Tweeks eyes widened in shock when he saw Craig. Kyle smiled “is it okay if I text Kenny, Cartman, and Stan? They were here every day except today. We’ve been waiting for you to wake up.” Tweek nodded. Kyle pulled out his phone and texted the group chat.

Within a few minutes they arrived. Kenny came running over and to Tweeks side. He pushed Kyle out of the way. Kyle screamed as he fell. “K-Kenny?” Kenny held Tweeks face “you’re awake.” He marveled. Tweek nodded and met his eyes. Kenny cried “I m-missed you.” Tweek smiled. “M-miss you, ngh, too.” Craig sighed “Tweek, I’m sorry.” Tweek tilted his head “for, ngh, w-what?”

“Leaving you. I shouldn’t have fucking done that. I’m an idiot.”

“N-no you’re, ngh, not.”

“Yes I am. I want to be here for you.”

“C-can’t, ngh, believe it t-took me, gah, killing m-myself to, ngh, make f-friends.”

Everyone’s face dropped

“Tweek” Kyle mumbled. Tweek smiled “it’s, ngh, f-fine.” Kenny shook his head “it’s not fine, but it will be.” Tweek smiled and yawned “w-when do I, ngh, go h-home?” The boys shrugged “probably never. You’re parents are shit, spazz.” Cartman said. Tweek sighed “I, ngh, k-know. But I’ve, gah, g-got no one e-else.” Kyle raised his hand “stay with me.”

“W-what? Ngh, why?”

“You need a loving home.”

“I, ngh, g-guess so.”

“We’re gonna be here for you.”

Tweek gazed at everyone’s faces. He felt better.

\----------

Tweek came to regret his suicide attempt. He may have gained friends again, but through such tragedy and fear. He could’ve just talked to someone. Tweek spent most of his days at Kyle’s house. His family was understanding and accepting. They moved Ike out of the room across Kyle and down in the basement. Ike didn’t care that much, he was happy to have his own area. They wanted Tweek upstairs and by Kyle so he had someone to go to when he was feeling low. Craig had also redeemed himself and started talking to Tweek again. He apologized for hours and cried. Tweek forgave him, of course. Tweek was kind and understanding.

Kyle threw parties at invited people over often. Tweek didn’t like noises or parties, so he spent the entire time in his room. No one blamed or judged him. Often some sober kids would walk in Tweeks room for refuge. Tweek made friends and recognized the people that walked in. One being Butters.

“Oh gosh, Tweek. There’s so many people.” Tweek nodded and patted the spot on the bed beside him “It’s, ngh, a-annoying. Drunk p-people, gah, are dumb.” Butters nodded and sat beside him “whatcha doin today?” Tweek showed Butters his sketchbook. Butters was one of the few people he trusted with his sketchbook. Butters smiled. “It’s a party.” Tweek nodded “ngh, y-yeah. I’m g-gonna, gah, add a l-lone figure in the, ngh, m-middle.” Butters smiled “do ya mind if I play some music?” Tweek shook his head “g-go ahead.” Butters connected his phone to Tweeks speaker and played some indie music. Tweek smiled “I, ngh, l-love this music.”

“Me too. It always speaks to me. It’s like it understands.”

“Y-yeah.”

Tweek and Butters stopped talking and drank in the music. Tweek sketching away. Butters had borrowed Tweeks Nintendo Switch and played Legend of Zelda.

Tweek eventually started singing. His voice was soft and light. Butters loved listening to Tweek sing. It was rare, but it was beautiful. Butters swayed softly and joined in with background vocals.

Tweek stood up and stretched “I’m, ngh, g-gonna get a drink. Y-you, gah, want anything?” Butters shrugged “surprise me. Alcohol or not. We can have our own party.” Tweek laughed and ran downstairs. He had mastered the art of being silent and unseen. He mixed a few drinks to make a fruity drink. He grabbed a gallon water jug and emptied it. He poured his mix in it until the jug was filled. “T-this should, ngh, be enough” he mumbled and grabbed two cups. He struggled to make it upstairs, but eventually did. Butters stared wide eyed at the jug.  “Oh jeez Tweek. I can’t drink that much.” Tweek shrugged “w-we’ll, ngh, share.” Butters still looked scared, so Tweek poured him a small cup. Tweek filled his up all the way. He took a gulp and sighed “s-sometimes you, ngh, just n-need to drink.” Butters looked at his cup “okay.” He took a sip and his eyes widened “this is real good!” Tweek smiled and sat beside him “c-cheers.” They both tapped their cups together and drank.

Slowly they became less sober. Tweeks stuttering was gone and he was more open. Butters became more affectionate and honest. “I mean, like, ngh, I don’t really regret killing myself.” Butter gasped “Tweek! Why?”

“Well look. We are only, gah, hanging out cos I tried to kill myself.”

“Oh my god.”

“I only got friends, ngh, and attention cos I almost died.”

“You’re right.”

“So like. Killing myself was a good option.”

Butters shook his head. He cupped Tweeks face “no. you should’ve told someone. I understand how hard it was Tweekem, but still.” Tweek hugged him “I just wanted someone.” Butters cooed and held him “you have me, Tweekem. Always.” Tweek sighed and grabbed another cup. Butters hand his cup to Tweek “filler up.” Tweek laughed.

 

Kyle had thought he saw Tweek and was going to go see him, but was whisked away by Stan. But he was able to check now. Kyle walked up the stairs and to Tweeks room. He heard soft music playing and opened the door. Tweek and Butters were dancing and singing. They were stumbling and laughing. Kyle surveyed the room and saw two red plastic cups and alcohol. He walked towards the two cautiously. He didn’t know drunk Tweek or Butters. Tweek whipped his head towards to Kyle and clapped “ngh, shut the door behind you.” Kyle did and walked back “are you two okay?” Both boys nodded happily “never been better” Butters yelled. Tweek kissed Kyles cheek “you’re the, ngh, best dude.” Kyle tilted his head “how so?”

“You, ngh, found me and saved me.”

“Well, you’re welcome.”

“Dance with, ngh, us.”

Kyle allowed Tweek and Butters to grab his hand and drag him into a dance circle. Kyle laughed and spun around with them. After a few spins, Butters tackled Tweek into a hug. Tweek screeched and feel back on his bed. Kyle laughed and jumped on the bed. Tweek moved so he was resting his back against Kyle’s front and he was holding Butters. “Cuddles!” Butters cheered and curled into Tweek. Kyle wrapped his arms tighter around Tweek “of course.” Tweek fell asleep. “You still up Kyle?” Butters whispered. Kyle hummed.

“I feel real bad for Tweek. He’s had such a rough time.”

“I know Butters, that’s why we have to be here for him.”

“Of course.”

“I like Tweek, Kyle.”

“Me too.”

“I don’t mean as friends. I like him and Ken too much.”

“Oh.”

“It’s wrong, isn’t it?”

“Actually, there’s this thing called polygamy. Also, I think Kenny likes you and Tweek.”

“Thanks a ton Kyle.”

“Anytime Butters. Now let’s sleep.”

\--

Tweek woke up warm and secure. He cracked open his eyes and saw Butters. He was asleep, mouth slightly open. Tweek lifted his hand and ran it through Butters hair. Tweek turned his head and saw Kyle. Tweek sighed happily. He grabbed Butters hips and pulled him closer slowly, trying not to wake him up. Butters whined in his sleep and clutched onto Tweek tightly. Tweek flushed. He grabbed his phone and took a few pictures of them. He stared at Butters face a while longer.

Butters was just too cute. His fluffy and soft blonde hair, his beautiful blue eyes, and his caring personality. Butters was everything Tweek wanted. But Tweek also wanted more. Specifically Kenny. Kenny with his wild hair forever untamed, his ocean blue eyes, and he made Tweek laugh all the time. Both of them were what Tweek wanted and needed. Tweek sighed. That’s wrong, though. Three people together. Unheard of. Tweek wanted to cry. He didn’t care if he never dated those two, he was fine with their friendship.

Butters whined and opened his eyes. “Tweek?” He mumbled. Tweek smiled “h-how are you, ngh, f-feeling?” Butters groaned and moved his face into Tweeks neck “head hurts, but you’re real warm.” Tweek smiled “I’ll, ngh, g-get you headache, gah, m-medicine.” Butters smiled appreciatively. Tweek wiggled out of Kyles arms and walked to the bathroom. He looked through the cupboards. Oh. Right. He’s not allowed to be near pills or any medicine.

He walked back into the room “f-forgot, ngh, no medicine w-where I, gah, can g-get it.” Butters nodded and opened his arms “wake up Kyle then, and come back to cuddle.” Tweek smiled and shook Kyle “ngh, g-get up.” Kyle groaned “no. fuck off.” Tweek laughed. “S-Stan, ngh, needs you.” Kyle opened his eyes “what?” Butters covered his mouth and giggled. Kyle looked at the two “I hate you both.”

“W-we, ngh, need h-headache medicine.”

Kyle sighed and got up. “Fucking why?” Tweek sat back on the bed, resting his back against the headboard. Butters curled up under his arm and rested his head on Tweeks shoulder. Tweek pulled out his phone and scrolled through twitter. Butters smiled up at Tweek. He grabbed his phone and took selfies. Tweek caught him and smiled at the camera during one. Butters flushed and opened up his texts with Kenny.

B: heya Ken!!

K: Butterball!! How r u??

B: good! Cuddlin with Tweek. What about you?

K: wishing I was cuddlin with the 2 of u

Tweek smiled “i-invite him, ngh, o-over.”

B: come over!

B: Tweek said it was okay!

K: omw

Tweek giggled at the messages. Butter blushed and closed his phone. “O-oh, ngh, sorry about r-reading your, gah, messages.”

“It’s fine. I trust you.”

Tweek closed his eyes and rested his head on the top of Butters’. Butters sighed contently.

Kyle burst into the room “here’s your fucking medicine you gaywads.” A bottle was thrown at them, a water bottle soon followed. Butters jumped “ow.” Tweek glared at Kyle “d-don’t, ngh, hurt Butters. A-also, gah, Kennys coming o-over.” Kyle rolled his eyes and sighed “fine.” Butters rolled on top of Tweek and wrapped his arms around Tweek. Tweek moved his arms around Butters waist. “Comfy.” Butters mumbled, a happy sigh leaving him.

They heard a knock on the door after a few minutes. “Come in” Butters yelled. “T-this your, ngh, room n-now?” Butters rested his chin on Tweeks cheek and looked up at Tweek. He gave a cheeky smile “yeah.”

“Uh, am I interrupting?” Kenny asked. Tweek shook his head “n-no, ngh, just cuddling.” Butters frowned slightly but quickly smiled “join us, Ken.” Kenny tilted his head “how?”  Tweek scooched forward “s-sit, ngh, behind me.” Kenny sat behind Tweek, Tweek moved between his legs “s-see?”

Kenny nodded and wrapped his arms around Tweeks waist. Tweek rested his head on Kennys shoulder. Kenny thought about pushing his luck. He leaned and kissed Tweek and Butters cheek. Both boys flushed. Tweek turned his head and kissed Kennys cheek. Butters did the same on Kennys other cheek. It was Kennys turn to blush. Tweek and Butters shared matching smiles. “Can I kiss you both?” Tweeks eyes widened. “Y-yes.” Butters nodded “please.” Kenny looked between the boys, trying to choose who he should kiss first. Tweek and Butters shared a look. “Y-you, ngh, go first.” Butters shook his head “no, you go first.”

“N-no, you, ngh, go f-first.”

“No. you deserve to go first.”

“S-so do you.”

“Nope, you go first.”

“Ngh, n-no.”

“I said yes.”

Tweek was about to argue when Butters lifted himself up and kissed Tweek. “Well, damn.” Kenny mumbled. Tweek squeaked, he kissed Butters back. Their kisses were more of a competition. Tweek bit Butters lip. Butters moaned and rolled his hips onto Tweek. Tweeks hands moved up into Butters hair and tugged. Butters whined and dug his nails into Tweeks side. “Guys, I’m still here.” Kenny said from behind them.

Tweek growled and pulled away from Butters, just to turn and kiss Kenny. Kenny froze, eyes widening. Tweeks kisses were quick and filthy. Opened mouthed and wet. Kenny thrived off of them. He loved the fast paced passion Tweek held. Butters whined, feeling left out, yet enjoying seeing the two kiss. Kenny grabbed Tweeks chin and moved him away. Tweek sighed “o-oh god.” Kenny used a free hand to thread his fingers in Butters hair and pulled him up. Butters smiled and kissed Kenny. The change between Tweek and Butters kisses gave Kenny whiplash. Butters kisses were softer and sweeter. More cute and unsure. Kenny loved it. He couldn’t chose which ones he liked best, he craved both.  Butters pulled away and looked at Kenny shyly.

The three blondes stared at one another. “So?” Kenny asked. Tweek played with the blanket “d-date us?” Tweek asked. Butters nodded “please.” Kenny sighed “oh fuck yeah.”

\------------

Tweek was more than happy with the situation. He had two wonderful boyfriends who helped him through any mental breakdowns. Tweek loved everything about his boyfriends. Butters surprised him constantly with gifts. He left loving notes in his locker, sometimes stuffed animals. Kenny surprised him with kisses. Usually initiating a PDA code violation. Tweek still wasn’t completely healed, scars and depression don’t just go away, but he was managing better than he had.

Tweek smiled as he walked home with Kyle. He lived with Kyle completely now, their parents battled for custody and Kyles family won. Tweek wasn’t mad, he was the happiest he had been in a while.

Kyle was gushing and ranting about Stan. Tweek smiled and nodded along. He finally understood everything Kyle said about being in love and having a wonderful boyfriend. “You’re so lucky, Tweek.” Tweek tilted his head “w-what?”

“Two boyfriends. Twice as much love. Get laid two times at once.”

Tweek flushed “o-oh my god.” Kyle smiled and laughed “no, but seriously.” Tweek punched his arm and walked faster. “Wait, Tweek!” Kyle called after him. Tweek lifted a hand and flipped him off. Kyle gasped and threw himself of Tweeks back “stop hanging out with Craig. He’s teaching you bad things.” Tweek screeched and the two of them wrestled on their way home. Kyle stopped fighting before they opened the door. Tweek smiled, sort of out of breath, but happy. 

As soon as Tweek walked in, he was greeted by everyone he knew. Tweek stared wide eyed at the scene in front of him. It was a party of some sort. Tweek turned to Kyle “d-did I, ngh, forget y-you birthday?” Kyle laughed “no, this is for you.” Tweek looked confused. Kenny and Butters both walked up to him “happy one year anniversary.” Tweek tilted his head “of?” Butters kissed him “surviving.” Kenny kissed Tweek “you’ve survived a whole year since the incident, baby.” Tweeks eyes widened “y-you’re, ngh right. And you g-guys, gah, did this f-for me?” Everyone nodded “you deserve it, dude.” Stan said. Tweek smiled “t-thank you.” The party was fun. They played games and ate cake. Tweek got so many compliments and hugs. Even Cartman was being nice. Tweek couldn’t believe it had already been a year. Tweek gazed out the window. They wouldn’t notice his disappearance, would they?

Tweek slipped out and walked to the pond. He walked past and went to the spot he almost died. Tweek didn’t come here to die, he came to reminisce. He leaned on the railing and stared at the water below. A whole year had passed. Tweek relapsed once or twice, recovery was hard, but he was doing okay. Tweek breathed in the fresh air, he really had no urge to kill himself. “Tweek!” Tweek turned and saw Butters running towards him. Butters held his hands “don’t do it” he sobbed. Tweek kissed him “I’m, ngh, j-just here to t-think. Gah, not to d-die.” Butters sighed “oh thank you Jesus. Let’s go back and party.” Tweek looked at the river one more time. “O-okay.”

**Author's Note:**

> hahaha hi my names Micha and i self project my thoughts and feelings onto Tweek hnnnn and i also dont feel proud of this or like this at all but i wrote it here  
> yell at me in the comments bye


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